Jan and Els, a couple who shared almost five decades of marriage, chose to end their lives together in early June through duo-euthanasia, a legal yet rare practice in the Netherlands. This decision was a profound reflection of their lifelong partnership and love for each other.
Their story begins in Friesland, in the north of the Netherlands, where their campervan sat on a sunlit marina three days before their scheduled death. Jan, 70, and Els, 71, had lived a mobile lifestyle, spending most of their marriage on boats or in their motorhome. Jan joked about their brief attempts to settle in a conventional house, which never quite suited their adventurous spirits.
Jan's continuous back pain forced him to sit in a specific position, while Els struggled with dementia, affecting her ability to communicate. Pointing to her body, Els said, “This is very good,” but pointing to her head, she lamented, “But this is terrible.” Their mutual understanding and acceptance of each other’s conditions underscored their deep connection.
The couple's bond began in kindergarten and blossomed over the years. Jan played hockey for the Netherlands' national youth team before becoming a sports coach, and Els trained as a primary school teacher. Their shared love for water, boats, and sailing defined their life together. They lived on a houseboat as a young couple, later transitioning to a cargo boat for their business of transporting goods around the Netherlands' inland waterways. Their son, who preferred to remain unnamed, spent weekends and holidays with them, creating treasured family memories.
By 1999, the cargo business had become fiercely competitive, and Jan’s back pain, a result of years of heavy labor, worsened. Despite a surgery in 2003, his condition did not improve, leading him to stop taking painkillers that made him feel like a "zombie." Els continued teaching, but the burden of Jan’s pain and her progressing dementia led them to consider euthanasia seriously. They joined NVVE, the Netherlands’ "right to die" organization, to explore their options.
Jan explained his perspective to his family, expressing his unwillingness to endure prolonged suffering with physical limitations. The decision to stop living, as he put it, was made after careful consideration of their deteriorating health and quality of life. The couple’s unwavering love and shared resolve guided them to this final, profound choice.
Their son, understanding their decision, supported them through this emotional journey. The Dutch laws on euthanasia, which emphasize patient consent and medical oversight, provided a legal and compassionate framework for Jan and Els to end their lives together.
In their final days, Jan and Els found solace in each other’s company, reflecting on a life filled with love, adventure, and shared dreams. Their choice of duo-euthanasia, though rare and controversial, was a testament to their enduring bond and mutual respect. Their story highlights the complexities of love, life, and the right to choose one’s end, resonating deeply with those who hear it.
